【Diary】2010-3”About J”①

March 14 is White Day. It was the day I promised to go to J and Snowboard. I am going to pick her up at 11 o’clock. I arrived at a convenience store a little after the appointment time. She didn’t seem to be coming for a while, so I decided to take a break in the cozy sunshine of March.

The sky was fine and clear with no clouds. From somewhere, I heard a publicity broadcast of a ”Japanese doll”. I wondered what kind of people would listen to this propaganda and who would be buy the Japanese doll. I smoked a cigarette and she still didn’t come, so I decided to read a newspaper in my car. I don’t remember the content.

J came about five minutes later. It’s been a long time to meet her. I don’t remember anymore. I took J in my car and handed the newspaper. It seems that it was a different newspaper even though she brought it home. We got on the high way and started running fast, listening to my music player’s hard rock. I don’t remember anymore what I was talking about, but I was absorbed in talking and passed the destination K interchange.

We had more customers than we thought we would get to the ski slopes, most of them elementary and junior high school students. The snow on the course seemed to have melted considerably in this weather, and some places had exposed soil. I rented my board and shoes, changed into clothes in the changing room, bought a lift ticket and smoked while J went to the restroom. Get ready, get on the lift and secure the board to your feet. From above the slopes, I was able to overlook the city surrounded by the clear winter sky. If you look from the bottom, the course that doesn’t matter much is more inclined and your feet are freezing than you would look down from above. I was a beginner and urged J to slip first, but he slipped first because she was so scared that she couldn’t get up. The body does not move as expected by fear. At first, the board was caught by the track of snow several times and fell vigorously, but as she turned around, she was as flashy as she was. I regained the sense little by little and remembered how to enjoy.

After sliding for a while, I sat on the middle of the course and waited, but he couldn’t get down easily. Looking backwards, he is still sitting on the spot where he just fell. He waved his hand and urged him to come down, but as soon as he got up and slipped, he fell down, which was ridiculously ridiculous. I walked with the board up to where he was. I had been snowboarding many times, and after finishing the exams, I told myself that I wanted to go to snowboarding, but I couldn’t go any further. Why do you have to teach a snowboarder newbie who has been doing it for years, how to slide from scratch? I was so sorry to return home without slipping, so I decided to teach you how to slide.

First I slipped a little, and he rolled behind and arrived. Repeat it over and over, and when it reaches the bottom, it will rise again. At first I was listening to his parents talking on the lift and what they wanted to do when choosing an apartment, but after a while they stopped talking. The sun has set, and the number of slopes has decreased.

At around 5 o’clock an announcement was made and the daytime business hours were over. A sweeper with a large caterpillar leveling the snow climbed on the slope. We ate while having a good conversation. Both were very tired. I thought it would be good to go back. He was lying down on a table. When I came back with two cigarettes after the meal, employees were decorating the slopes with candles. J leaned on the outside deck and watched it. With a face that seems to want to hear something.

I bought a night lift ticket and restarted Snowboard. There were only junior high school students besides us. When the area was completely dark, the number of couples increased. It was my first time to ski with a night game, so it was really fun. The cold wind of the night looks up. An announcement announces the time of the fireworks. We lay down and watched the fireworks from the top of the course. There was nothing to talk about, no air to talk about. Small, simple launch fireworks bloomed and scattered in the winter night sky. The weather was fine and the stars were beautiful. The little lights of the city, overlooking the slopes, signaled the end of the day. Very romantic. Next to me is a 19-year-old girl in ski wear sitting and looking up at the night sky. Most of the guests around me are couples. What exactly is this situation?

“The fireworks were beautiful,” he said, and went down. I went into the dining room to take a break. very sleepy. Go to the toilet and smoke. He looked at the decoration of the candles embedded in the slopes.

I said, “Can I go to a hot spring?” A hot spring that I have been able to do before. It was past the admission time, but it did. After a day of playing, the hot springs were awesome. Someone forgot that when. As the store closes soon, when I get out of the bath, there is no one in the changing room. I was sitting in a chair at the entrance of the store and waited for about 10 minutes. There was almost no conversation in the return car. I returned home on the lower road. I bought canned coffee and tobacco at a convenience store. I was singing alone listening to Iron Maiden. There was really no conversation. We sent him home and the day was over.

The next day, an email came from Y and the trip was postponed. I decided to go to Echigo-Yuzawa to fill that time. It would have been nice to go alone, but I decided to invite J for the time being, since I had been there since I went along with the hot spring. Of course, I didn’t think this would happen, so I dared to invite. OK with two replies.

J “I talked about it, but I thought it was fun yesterday, so I wake up in the morning.”
“ I couldn’t slip at all even though I invited me to go from myself.

On March 16, I left City I in the morning. Take the highway from the M interchange to Niigata. Arrival is at 5 o’clock. I hardly remember conversations in high-speed cars. All I remember was listening to Aerosmith on his iPod. I took a break in the S service area and tried to put on a pierced earring that I bought this morning in the toilet, but it was difficult. I asked J to put it on. Advise him to smoke and turn back now. Then drive for a while on a highway and follow the general navigation to Niigata. While running somewhere along the river, the air inside the car changed for some reason. I don’t know what the story was, but he got angry. He didn’t like the reason I invited him. I had been telling me to take me to a hot spring, so I invited him. There seems to be a problem with the phrase “I invited you”. I feel sick to be a bad guy.

“So why did you come with me? You didn’t want to go to the hot springs anymore, wouldn’t it be nice if you didn’t want to stay at home and would take you anywhere?”

When I said that, he silenced. This is the same sin.

“I’m bad and you’re bad, this is a chara, ah, I feel sick.”
J “Why are you feeling sick?”
“Because I wore it with a person I don’t understand well so far”

He got angry again.

J “I do not feel refreshed”
“So what’s not refreshing?”
J “Good”
“I’m not good, I’m not refreshed unless you’re refreshed. Let’s solve it by thinking together why you’re not refreshed now to refresh each other.”
J “That kind of thing is awkward!”

I think I entered Niigata like this. I settled after talking for a while. This kind of discussion deepens our relationship with people. The conversation after that was fun. I heard Yuta’s disgusting story, talked about Y, talked about J’s parents, crossed the rainy pass and entered Yuzawa. There is a tremendous amount of snow on the side of the road. Truly a snowy country. I thought about going to the hot spring, but I went to Tsutaru Station first.

The rain station was very quiet and no one was there. On the road in front of the station, the stairs went down, but most were covered with snow. I sat down on the top of the stairs, slightly out of the way, and smoked while watching the rainy snowy mountains. Surely Yasunari Kawabata would have seen this scenery. But that’s what it is.

We headed to the Shimizu tunnel. There were two new and old tunnels. We went over the snow to the railroad track, took a picture, and watched the tunnel together. “When I passed through the tunnel, it was a snowy country. The bottom of the night turned white.” When I was immersed in the novel world for a while, the rain was getting stronger. I decided to go back to the hot spring.

I chose the hot spring because there was an open-air bath, but there was no open-air bath. There was only one bathtub in the bathhouse. That’s also pretty small. The river was visible outside, but the view was not so great. I’m going to come out an hour later, but that’s not going to last an hour. I got out of the bath in about fifteen minutes and smoked outside. A threesome like a college student has arrived. It might be a training camp in a circle or something. I went back to my car and looked for today’s inn. The time has already passed six o’clock. Every cheap inn was full. I gave up and smoked, sat in a chair in front of the stand and waited for him to come out. After a while, he finally came out. When you come to a hot spring with this guy, you always have to wait. I decided to go back home.

The snow-capped mountains and clouds that obscured the sky reflected the orange lights of the ski slopes, and the whole town was strangely bright at night. We ran along the no-passes, talking to each other about our parents, old stories, and the upcoming semester. When I noticed, there was no cloud in the sky that had been overlooking until recently, and I could see beautiful stars. I opened my mind little by little to this unknown woman before I knew it. The conversation between them and the warm singing of Don Henry resonated in the car. I decided to take a high speed and eat at the O service area. After eating, I stopped outside. From there I was able to overlook the city C. I don’t remember when it was time, but the city lights were shining beautifully in Nagano’s clear air. I invited J to look at it together, but I didn’t want to be confused because of the air. Then I went back to I City listening to jazz. On the way, I noticed that the empty lamp was lit and got off the highway in a hurry. The gas station in M ​​City was almost gone. I refueled at Takamori’s self while praying not to stop because I asked. I just wanted to send J home.

J “Hey”
J “Nothing”
“What the hell is it?”
J “Are we going back already?.”

“OK , Let’s go somewhere.”

I have heard it somewhere. As good as it was, I felt lonely to return home somewhere. Does it mean that the distance between our hearts has shrunk? I talked alone while showing the live of FARYOBEYOUND THE SUN and G3 who entered the IPOD. I thought about going to see the night view on the hill I said in the past, but I couldn’t remember the place, so I decided to see the stars in Kawahara after all.

The city I stars are beautiful. He explained how many seats are and what this is. I am always surprised at the recent lack of knowledge of constellations among young people. Can I have a 19-year-old who doesn’t even know Orion? We wrapped up in a thin towel that was on a car for a journey and continued to watch the stars under the cold skies of March.

When you are surrounded by this extraordinary and fantastic air, together with a woman with a beautiful appearance, not just this guy, thinking that you are a man and a woman is next to you. I will. As soon as you remember that you are of the opposite sex, something like a big wall is born there, and you feel a sense of emptiness and teeth. The other party is a junior high school idol. He was a man from another world that was never reachable. Even if it isn’t now, the eyes that look at her at that time remain in me. I was told that it was my stalker, and could I keep my normal reason in such air? However, I have grown up. I did not hurt myself or my opponent with the motivation of such temporary impulses or past assumptions. Such uncertain feelings can no longer move my heart. After all, they don’t appeal to me for what I want. There is nothing but emptiness and disappointment. I seem to be too old to be a slave to sexual desire. Once again, I think I’m a boring person. Perhaps that was what you wanted, and boring might be an inappropriate expression.

I saw some shooting stars. Passion for me, a strong heart that is second to none. It was around this time that I wanted to fulfill such a greedy wish more than anything else. We lay down in a heated car so we couldn’t stand each other’s cold. The eastern sky began to brighten, and the cold winter sky gradually melted. The morning came with no sleep. Cindy Lauper’s TIME AFTER TIME was flowing inside the car.

As I was hungry, I moved my car because I wanted to eat something somewhere. When I went off the farm road to the national highway, I met a big tractor and was almost hitting it. Had J not shouted, it would have been really hard. Family restaurant was not open after all.






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